


Through the Glass

by chewtoy03



Category: Call the Midwife
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-12-28
Updated: 2018-03-07
Packaged: 2019-01-26 18:27:29
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 7
Words: 18,169
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12563488
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chewtoy03/pseuds/chewtoy03
Summary: A modern twist but following some of the plots from the show.An unexpected starting point but always an inevitable end.





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> It has been many years since I've posted any fiction. I've recently got back in to writing. 
> 
> I will never claim to be the greatest writer but I do enjoy letting my warped imagination flow on to paper. (This also may include the odd graphic scene.) The first chapter is a shorter one but hopefully will get longer as time goes on.
> 
> I am also incredibly sporadic with the updating! I will do my best.
> 
> Anyho, on with the fiction.

**Babs and Val are out - ;-)**

Patsy picked up her phone as she walked out the hospital. Truth be told, it had been a horrible shift, she had lost a baby due to unforeseen complications and had to break the news to the distraught parents. Right now she wanted to curl up with a large glass of wine and debrief her day to her housemate before shutting her bedroom door and letting the tears fall. Patsy stood still, pondering her options. She could go and see the delectable Miss Busby who would surely help her unwind and take her mind off the appalling end to her shift, she could also possibly include wine in that equation and kill two birds with one stone.

The only issue with the scenario was being in Delia's bed afterwards. After an initial drunken fumble they had agreed to stay friends with benefits, or Delia's more crass term, fuck buddies. After 8 months of casual lays and an hour here and there Patsy felt herself compelled to spend more time in Delia's company and soon found herself sleeping overnight and waking to Delia in the morning. Patsy enjoyed the early hours spent next to her sleeping counterpart, watching the small twitches and expressions across Delia's face. She longed to reach out and touch Delia and whisper sweet nothings in her ear. Every time she came close she backed away from revealing her true feelings; Dr Patience Mount, the ice queen or so the whispers around the gynecology department said.

Patsy had confided her feelings to her housemate Trixie who's only advice was to tell Delia how she really felt. She couldn't, it had taken 13 years to get to this level with her best friend, let alone someone who she had known 8 months. Still, a quick shag may do her some good, Patsy moved her feet and carried herself across to her car, promising that she would only be staying for an hour, two max. Picking up her phone she responded to Delia. **I'm leaving work now, I'll be with you in half an hour.**

Delia smiled at her phone as she read the response, she really did enjoy spending time with the redhead. Picking up her empty plate she deposited it in the sink and began the pile of washing up her flatmates had left her. She had been to Patsy's and Trixie’s place often enough and always found it to be immaculate in comparison to hers. The first time she had gone back to the doctor's she had been too drunk to notice that she lived in a house, in the middle of Kensington that was lavishly decorated, oozing charm and money. It was only when she awoke on the large sofa wrapped in a fur blanket did the surroundings really sink in, it was a further minute before she realised who she had slept with.

The infamous Dr Patience Mount was a woman to be feared throughout the maternity ward. The doctor had managed to climb the greasy pole in record time and current held the title of Registrar. She held such an air of confidence and efficiency she often had more respect from the nurses than the consultants. Patsy was only ever known by Doctor Mount or Patience to other doctors on the ward and little was known about her personal life. Delia heard rumours about the doctor and she certainly couldn't deny the temptation of the delectable Patience Mount. Few years and many encounters taught Delia valuable lessons in confidence. She leant on the counter, eyes flicking, skintight trousers or skirt and shirt seemed to be an ever revolving uniform. Delia’s eyes travelled up and down the slender calves, extenuated by the heels. She pondered for the briefest of moments how the registrar could stand in the heels for 10 hours. The woman stood in front of her was exquisite, she had heard that nobody in the department (male or female) had succeeded in asking Patsy out. That was until one newly qualified Nurse Busby appeared on the scene. The nurses watched in awe and some apprehension as Delia sidled up to the doctor and asked her if she would be attending the bar with the others after work. Dr Mount tried to refuse but apparently the small Welsh nurse was persistent and the biggest downfall for Patsy was the bright grin splayed on Delia's face. She relented and found herself several hundred pounds down, rather drunk and indulging in her wants by taking the nurse back to her place.

 **I've just stopped back at home, be 10 mins late.** Delia picked the phone up with a wet hand and read the message, tutting at the doctor who apparently bawled people for being late but couldn't manage her personal life if she was given an assistant. “Bollacks!” The brunette cursed and the phone jumped out of her hand and into the soapy water. “Good job you're waterproof.” She fished the mobile out of the water and set to drying it with a cloth. Delia sent a gif back; something she had only just learnt how to do. Christ, she was getting on, 25 and already failing in technology.

Delia finished clearing up and retired to her bedroom, stripping herself of all her clothes and slipping under the cool sheets. I've left the door unlocked, I'm in my room. Come find me. She tapped out quickly on her phone before pulling up her Facebook app. As much as she hated it admit it, there was something immensely satisfying about seeing her old “friends” pulling pints or up to their eyes in shit stained nappies 3 children later. Delia couldn't resist having a snoop around Lowri’s Facebook, although not friends she could see enough to get a good picture of her life. She looked at the last picture, dated two weeks ago in Thailand, her body sun kissed and glowing. At that point she realised how long she has been looking at that photo. “Good memories.” She muttered, exiting the application. Delia turned her attention to her own photos, scanning her phone's nearly full memory for anything she could erase. Delia came across photos of her time with Patsy from the last few months. She stopped at a particular favourite that she had promised that she deleted to Patsy from their initial meeting. It showed Patsy, eyebrow cocked, mouth sideways with a devilish smile and a grinning Delia. Little did anybody except the two in the photo know that the doctor had just suggested that Delia go home with her. Delia heard the door click, clicking off her phone and chucking it to the side she sat up slightly, wondering who was in the flat as no red head had appeared at her door. “Pats?” She called out before hearing a loud pop of a cork.

“Sorry.” Delia heard the well polished accent that only money of a certain status could achieve. “Fucking awful day.” Patsy knocked on the door before entering the room with a pint glass full of wine.

Delia looked at the beautiful woman stood in front of her, the polished appearance slightly fraying. It made her even more irresistible. “Has anybody told you you have the manners of a lady and the language of a well educated sailor?”

“Only you.” Patsy smiled as she removed her heels and placed the wine on the nightstand

“Bloody hell Pats. Did you get the whole bottle in there, or consider offering your host a glass?”

“Have some, I stopped off home to get that, it's part of my Father's collection.”

“Rather expensive.” Delia mused before taking a gulp of the red liquid, she grimaced. “I don't think my tastes are refined enough to appreciate.”

“It's Château Pontet Labrie. Rather nice for a drinking wine, blueberries and a hint of chocolate.” Patsy took another sip. “Just slips down.”

“I take it I can't buy that in Tescos.”

“Father's latest trip to Bordeaux. Came back with a case of the stuff, a gift I would imagine.” Patsy took another sip. “Although for a thousand pounds I would have preferred a fur coat.”

Delia nearly choked as she sipped the wine. “A thousand pounds, one bottle?” She contemplated spitting her mouthful back in the glass.

Patsy laughed. “No, a case, 12 in a case Deels.”

The brunette did the math. “That's a hundred a go!” She eyed the wine. “You could charge me a tenner just for the sips I've had. No wonder you complain at my tastes.”

“Sorry Deels, I couldn't bare anymore of that box wine.” Patsy dropped her skirt to the floor before folding it and placing it on the desk, it was shortly followed by the remainder of her clothes.

“Doctor's salary versus nurses.” Delia said with a smile as her companion slid under her sheets. “Wanna tell me about it?”

“Not right now.” Patsy reached for Delia, her long fingers dictating how the night was going to end.

 ---

Patsy leant against the headboard and turned her head to Delia's sleeping form, the light from the street giving Delia a shapely silhouette. Casting her eyes from the naked back down to the dents of Delia's buttocks Patsy steadied herself. Everything about Delia held her captivated and she wanted so much more, for the first time in a long time she felt something inside of her. She wasn't wanting to just eat sleep and work; she wanted Delia in the mix as well.

Patsy rolled onto her side and moved Delia's long hair from out of the crook of her neck, exposing the muscle on the shoulder before leaning down and placing a soft kiss. “Delia Busby, I wish I could tell you how much I love you.” Patsy rolled away and swung her feet over the edge of the bed. She pulled her skirt back on, proud she had almost stuck to her resolve but had actually removed herself from Delia's bed. As Patsy opened the door she turned to take one last look at the sleeping form on the bed. Instead she was met with a wide eyed Delia.

“You love me?” Patsy felt her stomach bottom out and her adrenaline level spike, her fight or flight reaction was kicking in. Patsy did the one thing she knew best, flight; to run from one's problems.

Delia scrambled up after the doctor who was already at least 10 steps ahead of her. “Pats, wait!” Completely oblivious that she was still naked and there was a possibility of her flatmates now coming home from their night out. “Stop!” She yelled. Delia heard the front door of the building slam and Patsy's heels tapping fast on the pavement. Opening the sash window, Delia stuck her head out just in time to see Patsy slipping behind the wheel of her car and driving rather erratically away. “Shit.”


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Delia tries to get through to Patsy, the Doctor is not having any of it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hello, firstly let me just say how overwhelmed I am at the response from the first chapter and a big thank you!!
> 
> I am away next weekend so there may be a two week delay - hope this suffices in the meantime!

By the time Patsy reached her car she was pouring with cold sweat and her hands were shaking so badly she could barely operated the fob for the Jaguar. After three unsuccessful attempts she realised that she could have just use keyless entry. “Fuck!” She cried out to nobody as she slammed the door to the car and threw her bag onto the passenger seat. The redhead tried to compose herself for a moment before pushing her foot hard on the clutch and clicking the on button; this only took two attempts. The car roared into life and Patsy floored the accelerator, the realisation she was probably 3 or 4 times over the limit did not enter her mind until she was by Madame Tussauds. 

Patsy began to slow her car down as she reached her road, the last thing she needed was a scene in front of her snobby neighbours and an argument that would only result in Patsy losing her temper. As she opened the front door she was met with darkness, Trixie was either with Christopher or up stairs shagging him, she cocked an ear for a brief moment; the former. Not bothering to turn on the light, she headed straight for the kitchen, or more importantly, her alcohol cupboard. Picking up a tumbler, she reached for the bottle of Auchentoshan. Pouring herself a large measure she opened her patio doors before sitting on the stool and lighting a cigarette. 

\--

Delia sat on the sofa, staring at her phone. Her finger hovered over the call button next to the redhead’s name, she knew that it would be pointless. Sighing, Delia threw her phone next to her and dropped her head into her hands. Delia had mulled over some time ago that the possibility that Patsy was something more than a fling, they spent nearly every free day with each other; it wasn’t like Patsy turned up and just shed her clothes, fucked and left. Often she would arrive with some form of food and a bottle of wine before sitting with Delia to watch some god awful film. If Delia decided to make to trip to Kensington she often found herself being treated to the doctor's culinary creativity, sampling spoonful after spoonful of rich, gout inducing food. It was a wonder how Patsy kept herself in shape with what she ate.

The brunette reeled her mind back to an hour ago, the look on Patsy’s face spoke a million words. Delia knew very little about Patsy’s personal life, the redhead always gave the same closed off answers, playing her true cards tight to her chest. It had been Trixie who had filled in some of the blanks one drunken evening in the pub. Delia had agreed the two at the pub for a ‘shift debrief’ aka, ‘let’s get hammered to forget how shit our job can be sometimes’ and found herself opposite the blonde who had clearly lost control of her mouth. Patsy had always told Delia that she met Trixie at school and they had stayed friends ever since, this was partially true. What Trixie actually told her was she had won a scholarship to Beneden College and her first experience of Patsy was 3 girls cornering her in the library calling her every name under the sun, she was sure they were only minutes away from throwing a couple of punches for good measure. Trixie explained that Patsy shut her down immediately, stating she was fine and was dealing with the issue before pushing past her and walking off. It turned out that Trixie had been placed in the same house and was assigned a room with Patsy, it took 6 months of persistent questions before the redhead broke and revealed how bad things were for her.   
Delia recalled Trixie’s words. “She snapped at me, I mean really snapped. She flew at me, cornered me and told me that just because she was gay it didn’t mean to she wanted to sleep with me. I heard the rumours about her but never thought anything more, there was obviously the talk of her sister and mother...” Delia had always tried to get Trixie to finish the end of that sentence, inadvertently plying her with drink when she spent time with her but to no avail.

Delia heard the noise of her flatmates approaching the second floor flat, she did not wish to have a conversation at 3am to explain as to why she was sat naked in her dressing gown looking like she had to world on her shoulders. She chose to pick up her phone and scuttle back to her room, locking the door to prevent any drunken interruptions.

\--

Morning came too soon for Patsy, she found herself wrapped in a blanket with a splitting headache and a half bottle of whiskey lying next to her. She lifted up her right arm, checking the time on her watch. 11.03am; she was late. “Fuck.” Patsy uttered to herself before slowly pulling herself into a sitting position, making no effort move herself any further. The sweat began to pour across her body and before Patsy had time to think about the pain in her head, she bolted for the toilet, emptying the contents of her stomach (mostly) down the bowl. After what felt like forever, Patsy removed herself from the bathroom floor and headed upstairs to clean herself up, brush the remnants of sour alcohol from her breath and more importantly, drink an alka selzer.

\--

As soon as Delia had got to work that morning she checked the rota to see when the registrar would be putting in an appearance. Quite frankly the Welsh woman had no idea how she was even going to approach the fiery redhead, let alone last night's revelations. Dr Mount may have been known as the ice queen round the gynecology department but Delia’s facade was far more impressive. Her natural wide eyed smile went a long way, she could still emulate care and compassion but anybody who truly knew her, her eyes were dull.

It wasn’t until ten past three that Delia came across the good doctor, stalking down the corridor with a face like a smacked arse. Delia could tell she was hungover, she had been with a drunken Patsy more than a few times and hungover Pats was part and parcel of the deal. Patsy was remarkably good at hiding the state of herself after one too many gin and tonics, but there was always a few small tell-tale signs. The dark circles under her eyes (a sign of being overworked for sure,) bloodshot eyes from throwing up (again, she must be so tired her eyes water constantly) and the almost transparency of her skin, (she’s a redhead, she doesn’t tan?)

Patsy had failed to notice the small nurse stood with her back facing the corridor, absentmindedly checking off equipment and counting amounts.

“I need to speak to you.” Delia grabbed the doctor's arm as she walked past.

“I'm rather busy nurse.” Patsy's icy tone cut through Delia as she shook her arm free.

“Please.”

“Unless it is about care of a patient, then no.” Patsy strode off and reached a good 20 yards before Delia called after her.

“So I take it you don't want to talk about last night then?” She called after her, noticing several members of staff turn their heads to witness the scene unfolding in front of them. The sentence had the desired effect and Patsy stopped in her tracks. Delia smiled to herself and saw the determination on Patsy's face. She half expected to be pulled into a side room but the formidable doctor had other plans.

Dr Mount cleared her throat and called loudly down to the nurse’s station. “Nurse Crane, this nurse clearly has too much time on her hands, she’s wasting my time with questions that are nothing to do with work. Perhaps you could find her something else to do?”

Delia paled, she hadn't expected that. She looked across to the formidable charge nurse Crane, who had a face chiseled from stone. The brunette decided to move off before Phylis could get her claws into her, instead choosing to occupy herself for the remaining time on the ward.

\--

Leaning against the silver car, Delia waited. It was a cold September day and she was determined to hold out until she saw Patsy again. She made sure she was hidden from view until Patsy was about 10 paces from her, then there was no way she couldn’t miss the doctor, or more to the point, the redhead ignore her. Delia traced small patterns into the car's exterior, the moisture gathering as the sun went down and the temperature dipped, nightfall threatening its inky fingers once more. The brunette looked down at her designs that had disappeared, the cars paint work impervious to dirt and showed Delia that Patsy was immaculate in just about everything. Delia’s thoughts we interrupted as she heard the familiar light tapping on the tarmac and instantly looked up; the sound of Dr Mount’s infamous heels could be heard anywhere. “Patience Mount.” Delia did her best impression of an English accent and failed when her west Wales lit hit on the O.

Patsy paled for the second time in one day and stopped, fiddling with her car key. “I’m not doing this.” She said through gritted teeth, moving towards the boot to put her paperwork away. “There’s nothing to talk about, last night was a mistake, I was over tired and had too much wine.” Patsy found herself flailing, the pathetic excuse that had just rolled off her tongue was nothing short of embarrassing. 

Delia locked eyes with the redhead, steel blue meeting hardened ice, the silent fight already raging between the two. The small nurse moved round the side of the car, blocking the driver's door and attempting to get nearer the doctor. “Patience, you have two choices, you come with me quietly and have a civilised conversation over a drink or I sit on your car bonnet and we have this conversation in front of the whole hospital and I will leave no detail of our sexual encounters unturned.”

“You wouldn't dare.”

Delia crossed her arms defiantly, licking her lips, deciphering which trick to pull out next. “You clearly do not know me well at all. I rather like a dare.” She smirked in anticipation of her next sentence. “Why would I care if the entire hospital staff knew that when you cum you lift the corner of your lip,” Delia paused. “On the left.”

“Delia.” Pasty’s tone had changed, it was tone she used for bollocking the staff when they fucked up, unfortunately the small brunette had been on the receiving end of this tone on more than one occasion and it had rather lost its desired effect. “Don’t you fucking dare!” Patsy raised her voice but it still came out as a hiss. She moved round to the boot of her car, trying to juggle the files as she moved various boxes around to make more room.

“Or how about when you flush when I...”

“Delia, shut the fuck up!” Patsy slammed her car boot and locked it, scanning the carpark for anybody who may of heard. “Why can’t you leave me alone? We were fucking, nothing else.”

“You and I both know that is horse shit Patience.” Delia leant back on the driver' door. “I am not moving, it's your choice. I’ll give you thirty seconds to make your decision before I make mine.” Delia took the opportunity to study the nails on her fingers.

“What the fuck is wrong with you? This is blackmail.”

“Then I suppose you better get your solicitor involved, better look up the definition of slander too whilst he’s at it.” The redhead stepped towards Delia, invading her personal space, trying to use her height to gain the upper hand. “You may be six foot plus in those heels but I grew up with 3 brothers, you really think that is going to have any effect on me?”

A minute went by before Patsy visibly deflated in from of Delia. “The Slug and Lettuce ok with you?” She pointed her key at the car and heard the familiar ping of the locks.

The walk was only a short one to the bar but it felt like an eternity to Patsy. Every step she took felt like a band constricting around her chest, the world around her was slowly falling inwards, she knew at any moment she was going to have a panic attack. “Control.” Patsy muttered, she hadn't had a panic attack in years and she was damn sure she was not about to have one now. It took all of the doctor's training and energy to focus on her breathing, whilst she slowed her walk and counted in for ten before breathing out for ten. 

Delia noticed the pace had dropped off and turned around to witness Patsy very short of breath and bright red. “You okay?” She placed a tentative hand on Patsy's back and rubbed slowly until the normal pallor of Patsy’s skin reclaimed her flush face..

“Yes thank you.” Patsy composed herself and began to stride back out and reached the bar twelve paces before Delia. She held the door open and gestured in front of her.  
“After you.”

“Thanks.”

“I'll have two large glasses of white wine.” Patsy called out to the barman.

“Any…”

“Something that doesn't taste like horses piss.” She retorted as she sat on a stool. Patsy watched as the two glasses were poured in front of her. “Here.” She slapped a £20 in front of the gentleman. “Keep the rest, I know i'm being a bitch.” She felt bad. “Sorry. Bad day.” A bright smile was accepted by the man before he tucked the remainder of the change into his pocket.

“So Patience does have the ability to feel.”

“Fuck you Delia.”

“Nice to know I can rile you.” Delia smirked as the drink was placed in front of her; she took a sip.

“What do you want?”

“I want to talk about last night.”

“I was drunk, I drank too much.”

“You know that's not true.”

“No.” Patsy said quietly, she paused to change tact. “Can we just forget I said anything and carry on?”

“Ordinarily yes, but not on this occasion. Pats, do you not get this is a little bit more than sex?” The flicker of the redheads eyes suggested she did but was not prepared to admit it. “I do not want to carry on doing whatever this is and have you hurt far more than you are now. Do you not understand?” When no response was offered, Delia switched her tangent. “How long have you felt like this?”

Patsy took the opportunity to study the stem of the glass before offering the true answer, not the one she had considered fabricating. “Six months.” The small whisper, barely audible escaped from her lips.

“Six months?” Delia physically reeled back at the admittance. “Why didn’t you say something?” She reached out to hold the redhead’s hand but she flinched and pulled away. “Pats, you’re hurting, why can’t you talk to me.” She firmly reached out and touched Patsy’s face, her hand cupping her cheek, this time being allowed to stay.

This motion still Patsy and she finally found the courage to look into Delia’s eyes. “It scares the holy shit out of me Delia. I do not do relationships.”

“Why not?”

“I just don't.”

The small brunette removed her hand from the red head’s cheek and looked directly into her eyes. She was always taught to never look a wild animal in the eye but this time she felt there may be a little more to Patsy. With every piece of sincerity and feeling she could muster she asked the question which had been running round her head for the past 24 hours.“Do you want a relationship with me?”

Delia watched two hard swallows force themselves down Patsy’s throat. “I believe it's a two person decision.”

“Pats, I’m trying here but you have to give me something.” She paused. “You told me you loved me.”

“You weren’t supposed to hear that.” A hoarse whisper was the only response.

“I did, that’s why we are sat here.”

“And if you’d been asleep like you were supposed to, we wouldn’t!”

Delia’s patience was wearing thin, she had tried the nice approach and Patsy was not approaching brash, practical Delia. “Christ, stop being obtuse. For a person who was top of the class you are remarkably dense. Look Pats, we fuck, we have that part down but in reality I know nothing about you. Offer me an oliver branch!”

“What's to know?”

“Are you serious, you have the nickname of ice queen.”

“I am aware.”

“And you don't care?”

“Not particularly.”

“Jesus, give me something, you're not making these easy.”

“There's nothing to say.”

“You are not just Dr Mount, you are a person as well. I have seen small pieces of you, why cannot you give me something?” Delia’s frustrations came through in her voice, the volume rising.

“Alright, what do you want to know. Do you want to know what it looks like to see your mother and sister die? You want to know what it’s like visiting your father in hospital for nearly 2 years? Or how about being forced to live at boarding school all year round until I was 18? Oh and the particular favourite or icing on the cake, everyone finding out you're gay at your all girls boarding school and making your life a living hell until you left?” Patsy stared at a silent Delia. “Thought not.” Patsy stood up. “That's the reason I don't do this.” She gathered her coat and bag. “I'm fucked up. I can't deal with emotions and I can't do this.” 

Patsy went to walk away but found her hand trapped by Delia's, she rolled her eyes and turned to look at her. “You said you loved me.”

Patsy looked at the floor and struggled to hold her composure. “I was wrong, I was confused.” She stared Delia back in the eye, her own blue orbs shining, desperately trying not to let the tears fall.

“Pats.” Delia’s eyes shone, tears threatening to overwhelm her vision. She leant forward and tipped her head upwards, her lips touching Patsy's. “You and I both know that is bullshit.” With that she turned and left, leaving an emotional wreck of a doctor.


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apologies for the delay and thank you for all your kind words and Kudos - I do read/see all of them.
> 
> I was unsure where I was heading with this chapter until I sat down and had a good think - mulling this over when you are at work is not the best idea as I pretty much ignored my job.
> 
> I have gone between Patsy and Delia in this chapter - I am hoping the time line makes sense.
> 
> We get to see a little more of the Busby clan and an insight in Patsy's past.

Patsy found herself sitting at the kitchen table once more, cigarette between lips, head still in her hands but with a different bottle of whiskey this time. She picked up the bottle of Ardberg and tipped it in into the crystal tumbler, enjoying the amber colour swirl round the glass, the peaty smell hitting her nostrils. She knocked down the drink in one gulp before resolutely pouring another; her Father would kill her if he could see how she was treating his favourite tipple. Patsy switched her thoughts to her Father, wondering how fucked up she would be if she had a normal childhood.

“Hello Sweetie!” Trixie chirped, her voice cutting through Patsy’s thoughts. “Oh dear.” She stopped at the sight of Patsy, the whiskey and the island. 

“Hello Patsy.” Christopher pushed past Trixie to put the bags of shopping on the kitchen counter, completely oblivious to the chaos that was currently Patsy. 

“Chris you are going to have to go.”

“Don’t leave on my account.” Patsy picked up her bottle and the glass and went to move.

“Don’t you dare! Sit back down.” Trixie pushed her friend back towards the island before turning her attentions to her boyfriend. “I'll see you tomorrow.” Chris received a short peck and a sharp push out of the room.

Trixie said nothing as she pulled out her dinner from the bags - M&S’ two for £10 was a godsend. She remained silent as she threw the lasagna in the oven before tidying the remaining bits away. It was a good 10 minutes before the blonde sat down in front of Patsy, she pulled another crystal tumbler from the counter and sat down on the opposite stool. Trixie watched as Patsy picked up another cigarette and lit it off the end of the dying one between her lips. 

Patsy sharply inhaled, the Marlboro reds burning her throat, a far cry from her usual menthol favourites. She was waiting for the inevitable, Trixie and the five thousand questions. Patsy would have been quite happy to sit on her own and brood until the bottle was empty, lungs were kippered and her liver on the brink of failure.

“Drink?” Trixie held the bottle over the tumbler and poured a generous measure before the redhead had a chance to say no. The blonde proceeded to rummage around in her handbag before pulling out her cigarettes. “No offense sweetie but I will not smoke that shit.”

“You know you’re not supposed to do that in here.”

Trixie flicked the flame from the zippo, holding the cigarette between her teeth but still managing to talk. “So, are you going to talk to me?”

\--

Delia thanked her lucky stars it was her three days off as she sat on to top of Foel Cwmcerwyn, her head was swimming with nothing but Patsy. Her mother has questioned her return to Wales, arriving at 11pm totally unannounced on a Friday night, giving her Mother such a fright as she turned her key in the lock she was threatened with a rolling pin. It took a bollacking from her mother, a hug from her Father and a sarcastic remark from her brother before she was allowed upstairs to her room.

Delia had assumed that sitting on top of the mountain would have helped her think clearer but sadly not. She had woken up at the crack of dawn, taken her mother’s car and driven across the Welsh countryside until she was at the foot of the hills. Slamming the car door she headed off with a small backpack of pillaged food and water.

The brunette had debated staying for breakfast with her parents however after a good mulling at 5am, she thought better of it. Her mother would grill her endlessly about why she had turned up unannounced, her mother was the last person she wanted to talk to about the whole Patsy situation. Delia chuckled to herself as she pictured the conversation with her mother.

“Cariad, whatever’s the matter with you?”

“Well Mam, I’ve been casually shagging the registrar on my ward and two days ago they told me they loved me when I was supposedly asleep. Oh and by they I mean she, and she is fucked up and will no longer talk to me.”

Yeah, that would go down really well. Delia had never formally come out to her Mother but she had never brought a boyfriend home to her in the 25 years she had been on this earth. Angharad Busby was far from a stupid woman, astute if anything except when it came to something she didn’t agree with. She either did two things, loudly voice her opinions or blatantly ignore what was staring at her in the face. Delia remembered when her Mother had caught her watching Sugar Rush in her early teenage years, they both had blanched and gone in opposite directions. Delia smiled at the memory, it was one of the more ‘racier’ scenes between two women, nothing shown but one of them was handcuffed to a chair.

She missed having her friends close by, that was the trouble with living in London, she had friends but none she felt she could talk to. The nurse did mull over the possibility of trying to talk to her flatmates for advice but despite living with them for 3 years she didn’t feel close enough to really talk. Barbara was nice. Nice was a mediocre word that really could only describe someone who was not an arsehole but had little personality. Trying to discuss sex and relationships with Barbara would probably result in her head shooting back into her shell and not coming out for the next decade. 

Val on the other hand was somebody Delia had yet to figure out. In work she was highly professional, her days in the army giving her a straightforward, no nonsense approach but had more compassion than the Ice Queen making her a good candidate for panicking first time mothers. Out of work she know how to enjoy herself, frequently coming home the next day but offering no explanation of what she had got up to the previous night. If Delia was perfectly honest she wasn’t sure which side Val batted for. The short haircut she sported could either make her very pretty or butch as hell depending on what she was wearing. Either way, she wasn’t a person she wanted knowing her personal business.

Delia was so lost in her own thoughts that she failed to notice the figure approaching until he was three strides out. She allowed her eyes to follow him as he sat down next to her, a flask was held out and she took a grateful swig before handing it back.

“Whose shitty life do you want to discuss first?”

\--  
“Sweetie, I really don't know why you think this is all a surprise. You told me how you felt months ago.”

“Do not say I told you so.”

“I won’t but can’t you see Delia is not Sarah.”

Patsy flashed her eyes at Trixie who dared to utter her name. “That bitch is nothing to do with what is going on.”

“I think she is everything to do with how you are feeling.”

“No, she is not and if you think I’m going to sit here and listen to you tell me why you can fucking well do one Franklin.”

“Unfortunately Patience that shit doesn't fly with me.” Trixie studied her best friend for a minute or two allowing her words to seep in before trying once more. “You going to talk to me?”

“What’s the point? I can’t take back what I said or what happened, I have to accept it and move on.”

“Sweetie you clearly like Delia, what’s so wrong with that?” The platinum blonde reached for the Doctor’s hand. “I was such a mess after I ended my engagement from Tom, I ended it but I was still a mess, I still loved him but I just knew it wasn’t right. I thought I’d never get over him but I did, I have Chris now.” Trixie squeezed Patsy’s hand. “He might not be Tom Hardy but Chris will do until he comes and sweeps me off my feet.” When she failed to even get a smile from Patsy she sighed. “Patsy, you can’t live your life in total isolation.”

“I don’t.”

“A quick shag does not count.”

“It does in my book.”

“How many other people have you been with since you have been with Delia?”

Trixie was met with a resounding silence, round one went to her however she knew she was in for the full ten.

\--

“What are you doing back at Mum and Dad’s? I thought you were at Swansea studying English?” Delia held on to the flask as she looked across the hills in front of her.

“I was.”

“You’ve dropped out?” Delia turned to look at her younger brother who offered no response. “Dai?” She nudged him with her elbow. “You cannot just say that and then think we can stop our conversation.”

He looked up and crossed his jaw. “There’s this girl, I’ve been with her around 8 months.”

“If she’s dumped you and you decided you’re too heart broken to continue your course I’ll bury you on top of this mountain.”

“No, it's not that.”

“Then what?”

“I’ve got a job.” Dai smiled weakly at his sister taking a large slug of the hip flask. “I’m gonna be a trainee engineer for BT. Twenty grand a year once I qualify.”

“Do Mum and Dad know?” Delia rolled her eyes. “Of course they don’t. What else are you not telling me? What has this girl got to do with it?”

“She’s pregnant.” Dai whispered, dropping his head, picking at the blades of grass.

“She’s fucking what?” Delia's head whirled around. “You fucking idiot! How the fuck did you manage that?” The brunette just about managed to restrain herself from clumping her brother. Delia couldn’t stop the next sentence coming from her mouth. “What are you going to do about it?”

“It’s too late. She was past 6 months when we found out.”

“Six months? Are both of you brain dead or blind for that matter? How the fuck do you miss your period for 6 months and not think you might be pregnant?”

“She told me she’s not that regular.” He shrugged. “She’s hardly got a bump, she’s tiny and runs everyday.”

“Bullshit. Ever heard the expression no glove, no love?”

“She was on antibiotics, we didn’t know.”

“If I had a pound for every time I’d heard that I’d be rich.”

Dai dropped the hip flask on the floor and pulled his knees up to his chest, Delia watched as the sobs wracked his body, the relief of telling somebody rolling off him in waves. She pulled her little brother into her embrace and hugged him tightly. “It’ll be ok brawd bach.” Delia kissed her brother’s head and felt his grip tighten. “You haven’t told Mam and Tad have you?”

“No.” He relinquished Delia wiped his eyes with his sleeve. “I’ don’t know how to.”

“You don’t have long, what about this girl, you haven’t even told me her name.”

“Anwen. Her name is Anwen. She’s terrified.”

“I’m not surprised. I see people in their thirties who are terrified of having a baby.”

“She’s 19.”

“You’re only 20, you know you’re allowed to be scared too.”

“I like her, I mean really like her. She’s funny, sweet, caring, I could list a million adjectives about her.”

“What do her parents say?”

“She told them, she didn’t want me to go with her but I wanted to. I didn’t want them thinking I was some deadbeat arsehole that wouldn’t do the right thing by her.”

“How did that go?”

“I think her Tad would have belted me if her Mam hadn’t been there. There was a lot of tears and anger. I told them I had quit university got a job and was in the process of getting a flat. They seemed to be slightly relieved when I told them that. They tried to talk about adoption but Anwen wouldn’t hear of it. She stormed out in the end.”

“Why didn’t you ring me? Why couldn’t you tell me?”

“It’s not the thing you tell your sister over the phone. Hey! Guess what? You are gonna be an auntie!”

“Alright I get your point.”

Delia and her brother sat in silence for a while, enjoying the feeling of the mid september sun on their faces, providing a temporary relief for both of them.

“So, as I am fucked,” Dai broke the silence first. “What shit has gone down in London to bring you back here unannounced.”

\--

Patsy awoke early Sunday morning, or late Saturday night depending on who’s opinion you were taking, she was drenched in sweat, feeling sick and now couldn’t sleep. Her doctor’s training knew it was her body's way of getting rid of the alcohol, it was common knowledge that alcohol made you sleep, however it was a little known fact that after the sleep came the insomnia. For Patsy, the insomnia normally kicked in around 4 or 5am. She found it best to just lay in silence and pray for the ceiling to stop swaying.

Half an hour passed before she gave up and padded across to her en-suite. Pausing for a brief moment she reached down the back of her throat and tickled her traecha the resulting motion making her gag. Another two flicks of her fingers and last nights part digested lasagna made a reappearance in the toilet bowl. The redhead leant against the cool wall once her stomach was empty, enjoying the cold tiles on her now sweaty back. She still felt sick but she didn’t feel like she had rocks in her stomach. Pulling herself to a standing position she swept her hair round and drank straight from the tap before swilling her mouth out with listerine. 

Patsy had spent many early hours of the morning to herself in boarding school. It was the only time she could allow herself to enjoy without fear of being taunted for the most miniscule of things. Most of the time she would sneak off to the school pool for a hour to herself, the teachers knew Patsy would not participate in swimming with the other girls due to the large scars that littered her body. Nobody needed to know about those scars, when it was time for PE she was allowed to go to the library to catch up on work. Patsy wondered to this day if the other girls thought she had preferential treatment and that some how she was above them. The redhead couldn’t haven’t given two shits, she would love nothing more to blend in with the girls, enthuse about boys, make up and what the latest social events were. Instead she found herself hiding, keeping well and truly hidden thanks to years of bullying, her sexualilty constantly on her mind and the prospect of leaving the safety of her room.

Patsy’s mind drifted back to the beginning of her university years, her Father had thrown her a house, a car and a couple of hundred thousand to pay for anything she could possible need before disappearing back to Hong Kong without so much as a blink of an eye. Patsy had found university vastly different to her years back in boarding school. Nobody seemed to care who you were, Christ in her first day in university she had seen two girls kissing in the canteen and several drug deals before lunch. It was at that point she decided she perhaps could loosen the control she held over herself ever so slightly. 

The redhead spent the entire first month drinking and shagging her way through the majority of the female population. The drink masked real Patsy and she finally had the chance to encounter the female form in all its glory, albeit in a fumbling mess of unsure hands and lips. After that it all seemed a breeze, get drunk, find a girl, straight, bi, gay, who cared, fuck, leave. As long as she got off she didn’t really care after that. Two rules, never give a girl your number and never take her back to your house that way all ties were kept severed with no chance of connecting. That was until Sarah arrived on the scene.

Sarah was in her thirties, long brunette hair, a perfect hourglass figure who knew how to dress and a dry witty sense of humour. Patsy met her in her usual manner, in a bar and was well on her way to being drunk, she clocked the brunette looking at her as she sat at the bar, legs crossed with a high pair of heels extenuating her shapely calves. Unashamedly Patsy ran her eyes over her before purchasing a second drink and heading over to the woman. The long story of that eventful 24 hours was Patsy broke both her rules.

Over the following months the trainee doctor spent much of her spare time with Sarah although doing her best, Sarah would always cancel on her last minute with little or no explanation. Patsy was in no way stupid, she was studying medicine that was proof of that, however for the life of her she could not figure out what was going on with the brunette. It was around 6 months in just after satisfying her urges that Sarah dropped a bombshell on Patsy; she was pregnant.

Patsy felt her chest constrict, the feeling that the world was closing in on her appeared in a second despite years of control the attacks. She felt Sarah’s hands around the back of her neck, the feeling making it harder to breath. She pulled back and tumbled off the bed trying to regain control once more. After 5 minutes she pulled her naked self into the chair in the corner of her room, curling her legs in front of her, pushing back up her physical barriers.

It was then Sarah revealed she was actually married, she hadn’t felt anything for her husband for years but stayed with him as they had a business together and it would complicate matters. The brunette tried to take a hold Patsy and kiss her, telling her she still wanted to see her but things would have to change; Patsy didn’t want to know. She told Sarah to get the fuck out of her house and never come back. Patsy took her key off Sarah’s key ring and blocked her number on her phone then and there all the while Sarah begged for Patsy to stop and think.

The last thing Patsy ever said to Sarah was ‘You’ve broken my fucking heart.’


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An old flame surfaces in to Patsy's past.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I sincerely apologise for the lack of update. I have struggled with writing this chapter and actually had it written for several weeks but decided against the direction I sent the story line in.
> 
> I have added a character in to the mix here who is not featured in the CTM series but is featured in another series. I am hoping somebody will get who I have borrowed!

Patsy had finally made it out of the house, Trixie had told her to get back on the horse,or had she? To be perfectly honest Pasty couldn’t really remember anything from the past few days, they all had seemed to merge into one. She sat in the cocktail lounge at the bar, surveying the land around her, deciding who could help her forget her car crash of a life. A shadow fell over her face, Patsy looked at the man stood next to her, she could really do without being hit on by a smooth talking arsehole. She took a look at the gentleman who felt that any woman was fair game, he was at least 6 foot 3, broad shouldered, stubble and had a bright smile. “Can I buy you a drink?” 

The doctor stared at him, she supposed he was a catch and she should be flattered but unfortunately for him she wasn’t. He did about as much for her libedio as a carrot. She was about to reply to him when a smaller brunette came stalking over, heels loudly tapping on the floor; the mark of confidence. “Babe, I am so sorry I am late.” 

Patsy felt a firm kiss be planted on her lips, it tasted of whiskey and a familiar perfume invaded her senses. The redhead pulled away and looked at the women, 8 years on, she looked older but not much had changed. In a split second Patsy made a decision. “That’s ok.” She leant forward and kissed the brunette, arms snaking around her waist, legs subconsciously opening to allow the women in. Patsy opened her eyes slightly and saw the gentleman push himself off the bar, she didn’t pull away first.

“You’ve dyed your hair.” Sarah pulled back and smiled at the now redhead. “It suits you.” She twirled a curl at the nape of Patsy’s neck, the motion sending shivers down her spine. “I hope you didn’t mind, I’ve been watching you for the last hour and when that idiot came over I thought I’d better come over.” She picked up Patsy’s drink and took a sip. “Your tastes haven’t changed.”

“Clearly not.” Patsy pulled Sarah towards her once more, the passion she felt for the woman renewing itself from laying dormant for far too long.

Caroline observed the game that her former student was playing from her elevated position. She had spent the last hour and a half watching Patience Mount prowl around the bar. She noted that the redhead seemed off her game; she had so far failed to capture the attentions of any female so far. Caroline had leant forward when a gentleman suitor approached Patsy, she smiled to herself, vaguely amused at the chap and his hopeful intentions. If he had any observational skill he would have noted that the redhead only had eyes for brunettes with bright smiles and eyes. She watched as a small brunette approached the redhead, her body language oozed confidence and her eyes flaired when Patsy readily accepted the women’s advances.

For the next half an hour she watched, slowly sipping her wine as Patsy and the brunette continued drinking at an alarming rate. Caroline took her chance when the brunette picked up her bag and made her way towards the bathroom, picking up her own back she headed across to the redhead.

“Patience.” Caroline sat opposite the doctor, placing her glass of wine next to her before crossing her legs. “I see your tastes haven’t changed, unlike the colour of your hair.”

“Caroline?” Patsy was half cut but she found herself suddenly feeling very sombre, not to mention now sober. She eyed up her former lecturer, unsure of why the women had sat in front of her. “What are you doing?”

“Oh come off it Patsy, you and I both know I like women and anybody with half a brain know this is a hot spot for professional women.” Caroline took another sip of her wine before continuing. 

Patsy looked at her former lecturer as if she was mad. “I don’t mean to be rude but I have somebody coming back in a moment.”

“Yes, I know. I’ve been watching.”

“What do you mean you’ve been watching?” Patsy looked at Caroline, eyes narrowing, waiting for what was coming. “Why have you been watching?”

“Call it an experiment.” The blonde women crossed her legs, the motion not going unnoticed by Patsy. “I was observing a predator in its natural environment.”

“Thought you taught chemistry not zoology.”

“Very droll.”

“I’ve got someone coming back, what do you want?” Patsy threw back the remainder of her drink and went to stand up; a firm hand was placed on her knee.

“8 years ago I did the same thing as what you are doing now.”

“I don’t know what you are talking about.”

“Patsy you are a erudite women, don’t make the mistake of taking this women home tonight for a quick shag, she’s not gonna help you forget your problems in the long term.”

“I used to love her.”

“Used to, key words. You don’t love her now do you?”

The steely eyes forced a rare confession out of Patsy. “No.”

“Come on.” Caroline slid off her chair and took Patsy’s wrist, tugging her in the direction of the door. “You’re coming back to mine, you’ve had far too much to drink to be in any fit state to get home. I have a sofa and a blanket.”

\--

Patsy found herself waking up in unfamiliar surroundings, her head pounding but not spinning like the previous few days. The lack of nausea was also a welcome relief, she could faintly smell coffee drifting through the house. Throwing off the blanket she had been wrapped in she sat upright and pulled the remaining grips from her hair, enjoying the feeling of it falling around her shoulders. She scratched her head, the motion helping shake a small part of her headache. Somehow she had ended up in her underwear and a small vest top, she had clearly not had sex as she couldn’t smell or feel any of the usual symptoms. Patsy quickly found her trousers and white blouse from last night, slipping them on she followed her nose to the kitchen.

“I wondered when you’d be up.” Caroline placed a cup of coffee in front of the redhead, she went to open her mouth to speak but was interrupted.

“Mother!” A loud crashing sound was heard as a teenage boy made his way into the hallway. “Mother!”

“Yes Lawrence, I can hear you, the whole of London can hear you.”

“I need to go to Rugby. I am supposed to be there in 20 minutes.”

“Well if you’d got out of bed when I told you then you wouldn’t have missed your lift. I suggest you come and take the change off the counter and get the bus.” Caroline stood with her hand on her hip and the other on the counter, awaiting the tantrum that was about to ensue.

“Mum don’t be so...” Lawrence stopping in his tracks at the sight of the redhead next to his mother. “Who’s this?” His eyes raked her up and down, coming to rest on the opening of her shirt and the bare flesh that was peaking out.

“This is Patience Mount.”

“Doctor.” Patsy mumbled behind her cup with a smile.

“She was a former student of mine, we met up last night and she had a bit too much to drink so slept on the sofa.”

“I’m off.” The change was swiped from the counter in a blink of an eye and he disappeared.

“Everything alright?” Patsy muttered before she took another sip of the coffee.

“Fine.” Caroline sighed. “He probably thinks I’ve slept with you.”

Patsy raised her eyebrows at Caroline. “Sorry Dr Dawson, not my type.”

“Likewise.” They both laughed together for a few seconds before it died off and the air suddenly because thick. Caroline looked at Patsy, holding her gaze before cutting the tension. “So now you’re sober do you want to talk about this?”

Patsy’s gazed immediately reverted back to the cup in her hands, she had no intention of spilling her life to a woman she hadn’t seen in 6 years.

“You remind me of me 8 years ago, do you know that?” When Patsy didn’t answer Caroline took her queue, she pulled up a stool and sat down. “When I met you all those years ago I was going through a tough time, my husband had had an affair, I was about to lose my house and I was struggling to come to terms with my feelings for one of my colleagues. She was kind, caring and about the only person who wasn’t scared of me. Sound familiar?”

Patsy laughed. “You were known to be terrifying and take no shit from anybody, miss lectures or deadline and that would be the end of your career. I rather admired you in a way. You were the only teacher would actually stuck to their word.”

“I remember meeting you, you were this scared child who suddenly had this whole wide world outside boarding school with so many different people. You had hard such a hard exterior and wanted to maintain it but then you discovered alcohol and women. It was like someone lifting blinkers. I watched you change over the first few months, you went mad, you had no control over yourself. You used to come in to lectures stinking of alcohol and sex, I’m surprised you could even concentrate. It must have been January second or third year, you changed. You stopped shagging everyone in sight, I knew there had to be somebody of significance involved. Your studies didn’t falter but you suddenly seemed to be happier, more feeling, more sympathetic. It was like watching you grow as a teenager in to an adult.”

“Sarah.” Patsy said quietly. “The women you saw last night.”

“I guessed as much, you don’t get a doctorate without having a few brain cells. It was around your exams when you went back off the rails, the old you came back fast. To this day I don’t know how you passed, let alone making in to the top three.” Caroline leant forward laid her hand on Patsy’s forearm.

“I used to see you in all the bars back then, when you wanted somebody you were ruthless. I suppose what I am getting at is what I saw last night. I saw that young girl last night, shutting down, you have an impressive facade but it doesn’t fool everyone.”

“It fools most.”

“It didn’t trick whoever she was did it?” Caroline gave a final squeeze of the the redhead’s arm before taking her hand back. “I took the liberty of putting my number in your phone last night. It’s there if you need it.”

Patsy was swallowing hard, the lump in her throat evident and she was fighting the sting of tears.She did what she was best at, deflected the emotion, pulled herself together and turned to look at the women sat next to her. “Do you have somebody now?” 

“I ended up marrying Kate.” She offered a small smile.

Patsy noticed Caroline couldn’t meet her eyes, she twiddled with the handle of her mug. “But you said about Lawrence and thinking...”

“I know what I said. She died, the day after our wedding, she was hit by a car. The doctors tried to save her but the injuries were too severe.”

“I am sorry.” Patsy reached out placed her hand around Caroline’s own clasped hands.

“Not as sorry as I’ll be if you end up without somebody. Whoever she is must be pretty special. I spent too much time wallowing in my own self pity after Kate, I couldn't see past her death, not what we had together. It ate me from the inside, I spent far too much time out of the house, not enough time with the people who mattered. I would go with random women and not give a damn who was hurt or involved. I thought I was better than that but..” Caroline shrugged. "All it made me was more distant, more lonely. I have my boys but I still don't have someone to share my life with. I met somebody, it must have been two years after Kate, she was..." She chuckled. "She was different, fiery, wouldn't put up with my usual shit. She gave me an ultimatum and I made the wrong choice." Her eyes suddenly bored in to the redhead's. "Think very carefully, don't make the wrong choice."


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Yet more angst I'm afraid - Phyllis decides to play mother hen.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to all those who are reading/commenting and kudosing! I am trying to reply to them!
> 
> Everyone got the Caroline reference - don't worry, she's most defiantly sticking around. I have finally figured out where I am going with the fic but unfortunately half the drabbles I have written do not fit. I may post them separately but if I am honest they are mostly smut!

Delia sat on the train, watching the green fields slowly turn into greying buildings, the smog becoming slightly denser as she reached London suburbs which she now called home. She reflected on her time back at her parents, she had resolved nothing. Instead she had chosen to sit and brood over what actually happened, her thoughts were still no clearer. It had all come to an explosive finish when Dai had finally come clean about his situation to their parents. At the rate her Mam was going she was either going to have a heart attack or physically strike her brother. As she chose to slink out the backdoor door unnoticed, her Tad followed, placing a kind hand on the small welsh women’s shoulder.

“Delia.”

“Tad?” She smiled.

“Delia, I know something’s up.” He tilted her chin to look at him in the eye, holding her gaze for a few seconds before quietly saying “Don’t let it consume you.”

Delia looked at her father, he was the kindest, most mild mannered gentleman anyone could ask for. She flung herself forward and embraced him tightly, the strength in her arms making his inhaled breath leave his body with a resounding whoosh of air. She had to let go before heading back towards the train station.

Delia pondered how her brother was getting on with her parents, she had had a text telling her the Welsh World War had begun. Their Mam was insisting on getting married and her Tad was currently playing referee.

\--

Three weeks had passed and Delia had become so fed up with Patsy’s blatant attitude against her she had chosen to switch to nights for the foreseeable future. Delia detested nights, she was a better person on days, she preferred getting up early, completing her 12 hour shift but still felt like she had a little bit of the evening to herself. Nights seemed to drag on forever and she felt permanently tired and more zombie than human. 

The mothers who gave birth at night were often far more tired than those who came in during the day. When she thought about it it must have been every 3 out of 5 mothers who had gone 24 hours or more without sleep. The only saving grace against the long, arduous nights were Doctor Turner. A kind man by nature who had spent many years as a GP before retraining as an obstetrics doctor. Most women were initially funny at the sight of a man helping deliver a baby, not wanting him to look at them naked below the waist but by the time they were screaming for an epidural or painkillers their worries had completely vanished.

After helping deliver her second baby of the night and nearing the end of the shift, Delia sat at the desk and popped a barley sugar in to her mouth. She thanked the little parcel Phyllis had left on the paperwork for the night, although this was the first time she had actually had a chance to actually eat the sweet. As the remaining hour ticked away, Delia sat eating sweets and filling in the necessary paperwork for the overpaid bureaucratic idiots who actually ran the NHS. As she ticked the boxes of the remaining sheet, the unmistakable shadow of Nurse Crane fell over her.

“I see you have found the barley sugars I left.”

Delia looked up and offered Phyllis a half smile. “I did thank you.”

“I hope you’ve offered them out, if you’ve eaten the whole lot your teeth will fall out.”

Delia grinned sheepishly. “I’ll take that risk.” She frowned as a thought entered your head. “Why are you here? Isn’t it your day off?”

“I am here because in precisely 3 minutes your shift ends and you look like you haven't had a decent meal in weeks. I am taking you to the cafe around the corner so I can ensure your survival Nurse Busby.” Delia went to open her mouth. “I suggest not responding to that or the next shift you’ll be scrubbing the bed pans.” The last part was said with a soft smile. “It’s nearly half 6, I’ll expect you out the front of the hospital in 15 minutes, no exceptions.”

\--

Delia was in the staff room slowly changing out of her scrubs and back in to her jeans and jumper when Patsy walked in. At this point Delia had nothing left to say to the doctor so continued changing out of her uniform with little regard for the redhead’s presence. Pulling off her top half she revealed the awful lower back tattoo she had got on a drunken night out in Swansea at 17. Her mother had never found out luckily, her Tad happened to see it peeking from Delia’s bare back one day in the kitchen. He had asked her where she had got it and she told him the honest truth, he then tried to rub the celtic design off to see if she was trying to pull a fast one.

Patsy had spent many an evening tracing the lower back tattoo, the first time she had been sober with Delia she had turned her around and looked at the tattoo. The redhead had traced it with fascination with her index finger, she had followed it around to Delia’s hips, the whole sensation causing Delia’s senses to heighten and a deep ache between her legs. Patsy watched as the tattoo shift on the welsh woman’s back as she changed, the fervent memories so clear in her mind. Patsy realised she had been staring as Delia rolled the final creases out of her jumper, she blinked twice and continued putting her possessions in the locker. She remained facing her locker until the water from her eyes stopped dripping.

\--

The short walk to the cafe remained silent between the two women. From the outside the cafe didn't look anything special, if anything it looked rather dingy and if Delia was perfectly honest she would rather have gone home and slept then eat at this shit hole. The cafe had the advantage of being a very short walk from the hospital and cornering the market of desperate nurses and doctors who were too tired to even attempt making their own food for themselves. The owner had also had to noose to keep the cafe open 24/7. Once settled in the corner of the shop Phyllis proceeded to purchase two cups of tea, the poor spotty teenager behind the counter was told to add extra milk to one cup no less than twice. Phyllis placed the tea in front of Delia who didn’t look up before sliding in to the chair. It was the first time she had a good look at the child sat opposite her. Her eyes lacked the usual sparkle, she has dropped a good stone, the paleness of her skin could not missed in the darkest of nights; Delia looked God awful.

“Here.” Phyllis passed the menu across. 

“I’m ok, thanks Phyllis. Tea is all I can stomach at the moment.”

“Rubbish. I told you you were getting a meal and a meal is what you are jolly well having.” She pushed the menu back across the table. “Pick something.”

Delia chose the lighter of the two breakfasts before resuming her absent minded stare into the teacup.

“Delia. I am not one to beat around the bush, nor I am interested in prying in people’s private lives but when it affects my ward I have to get involved. I’ve already heeded to your request to transfer to nights, at short notice may I add but you still seem like somebody had beaten you. What is going on?” Delia offered a childish shrug before retracting her bottom lip, trying to fit the well of emotion that was threatening to spill at any given moment. “Delia, you are an excellent midwife and nurse between you and me, one of the best on the ward. I don’t like seeing my girls upset, I want to know if there is anything I can do, I can’t risk losing a decent staff member and I cannot bear to see you as unhappy as you’ve been in these last fews weeks. ” She grasped Delia’s hand, trying to comfort her but the gesture had the complete opposite effect, Delia suddenly broke and the charge nurse found herself searching for a much needed tissue. “Here.”

After a couple of minutes the tears ceased rolling as frequently and Delia was able to form a sentence. “It’s Patsy.”

“Doctor Mount?”

“Yes.” She swallowed. “I made the huge mistake of shitting where I eat.”

“I had heard the rumours but as I say, rumours are just rumours. They are just like D and V, spreads like wildfire but only takes one to spread.”

“Never heard that expression before.”

“I like to make my own. I’m not trying to pry into all the details but I can’t stand you looking so down.”

“It all happened nearly 9 months ago, a silly drunken mistake that continued up until the end of last month.” Phyllis squeezed Delia’s hand again, she drew a breath and continued on. “Long story short, Patsy told me that she loved me and then freaked out. Apparently I wasn’t supposed to hear that.” A flash of Delia’s eyes told Phyllis far more than Delia’s short admittances. “After that whenever I tried talking to her she just shut me down, I can’t speak to her for more than 10 minutes out of her before the doors slam shut.”

Phyllis allowed the silence to surround them before the young chap placed their breakfast in front of them. The silence turned to scraping as Delia begun to slowly devour her breakfast, hunger quickly becoming evident as she shovelled copious amounts of eggs and bacon in to her mouth. The older nurse placed her knife and fork down when she had reached the halfway point. “What about you?” She finally asked. 

“What about me?”

“You’ve told me that Patsy is upset and shutting you down but you haven’t said about you. I asked you here because I wanted to know what was wrong with you, Dr Mount has played a role in that but I want to talk about how you are feeling, get it off your chest.”

Delia let out a loud sigh. “I’m miserable, sad, missing her, lonely.”

“Do you love her?”

The brunette paused, her mouth full, she chewed slowly. “Yes.” Phyllis allowed Delia a few moments before letting her continue. “I knew I was falling for her when I met her.”

\--

Delia stepped out of the cafe with Phyllis just shy of twenty past eight. She had discovered her hunger from three weeks of skeletal eating and consumed a bacon sandwich, a piece of lemon cake and all washed down with a further 2 cups of tea. Phyllis had kindly offered a lift home to Delia, the poor lass looked shattered and the idea of getting on the tube in rush hour was not an experience Delia particularly relished.

It was as they approached the hospital car park Delia felt a pair of eyes on her, looking round she locked her gaze with the redhead. Patsy refused to look away, instead she drew hard on her cigarette, one eye squinting as it always did when she taking a toke.

As the Welsh woman came closer to Patsy she couldn’t help but take a swipe. “Finished staring?” Delia rather hoped she would unsettle Patsy but in fact, it had the opposite effect.

“Not yet.” Patsy raised an eyebrow. “I’ll let you know when I have.”

Delia felt Phyllis’ strong hand on her shoulder, she shook it off, this time her anger unrestrained. “What is wrong with you? You’ve made my life a misery already, why do you want to make it worse?”

Patsy’s hard resolve cracked slightly, she threw her cigarette down. “Your life a misery?” She pulled herself off the wall she was leaning against. “It hasn’t exactly been a blast for me!”

“Well it wasn’t me who caused the issue was it?” Delia flew back, regretting her words an instance as she saw the pain hit Patsy like a physical blow.

“I love you, don’t you get that?” Patsy screamed, her tears spilling and causing her mascara to run down her face.

“Yes I know!” Delia hissed. “But you won’t do anything about it! You have never actually asked me on a date, if you felt that strongly why didn’t you? Hmm?”

“I’ve just told you that I love you, in the middle of the car park, for everyone to see. Don’t you get this Delia? I told you I do not do relationships but yet here I am, making a fool of myself for you!” Patsy paused for breath and felt her chest heave, the emotion so raw, so evident.

“I get it Patience, you just never seem willing to say anything else! The only time I get any information from you is when you are like this! I can't keep doing this! So tell me something, something that will make me want a relationship with you!”

“I, I,” Patsy stammered, trying to push past that mental barrier that she had constructed from many years of hiding.

“See, you can’t! You can’t say anything, you can’t tell me one little thing about yourself that no one else knows. I fucked you for 8 months but yet couldn’t tell me your parent’s names!” Delia reeled at the comment, she didn’t realise what had come out until it was too late. “Pats, I didn’t mean...”

“Alright Deels,” She gritted her teeth, stepping forward in to the brunette’s space. “My father’s name is Richard, my Mother was Catherine and my sister was Florance. You want to know more? You want know why my body is littered with scars, the thing that haunts me every day? I got to see my entire family blown up, I got to see my mother’s skin fuse to her clothes, I got to see my sister burnt to a crisp and I got to visit my father for 2 years in hospital because he nearly died!” She took deep heaving breaths, the outburst causing everyone in a 50 yard radius to stop and stare. “I lost my childhood to a stupid mistake, a stupid fucking mistake!” She yelled once more, fists wiping her eyes. “I had no-one after that day and I don’t need anybody now!”

“Patsy, please.” Delia managed to stammer out. 

“I don’t need anybody and I certainly don’t need you!” Patsy still stood towering over Delia, the hurt splayed on her face and her neck flushed from the anger and upset.

Delia held her nerve as she reached forward, touching Patsy’s cheek. “Why couldn’t you tell me?” Her voice grew stronger, her fingers gently caressing the side of her face. “Why couldn’t you tell me this? I’ve wanted to know you since the day we met, why has it taken 9 months to tell me this? Don’t you get it Patience? I want to know you, I want to know the good, the bad, the damn right ugly, I want to know all of you because I love you!”

Patsy began to sob, resting her forehead on Delia’s for a moment before pushing away. “I can’t I’m sorry.”


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Patsy reminisces of happier times before catching up with Caroline.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I've actually managed to update twice in a week. More to the fact I have put my back out so I have re-watched CTM in it's entirety.
> 
> Thank you for the loyal readers.
> 
> I am not entirely happy with the chapter but it is necessary in order to move the story forward to where I want it to go. Hope you enjoy.

Christmas was fast approaching and for the second year running Delia had the unfortunate task of working Christmas Eve and Christmas day, this time on nights. She cursed Patsy under her breath as she headed towards the nurses desk. She had phoned and told her family that she wouldn’t be making it for Christmas, her mother was not best impressed. It also meant she didn’t get the chance to meet her new niece Alice, yet something else her mother wasn’t impressed with, an English name. It was the 21st of December, she had finally finished her Christmas shopping and she was looking forward to the next few days off. Val and Barbara had gone back home already which meant Delia could lounge around naked, watch all the crap TV and order a Chinese take away, not quite the Christmas she was used to but still a relished idea nevertheless.

Delia stood in the staff room once more, slowly changing out of her uniform in preparation to go home. She was waiting for the redhead to make an appearance, as well as now being on nights, Patsy’s shift was also on the opposite days. She heard Patsy coming a mile off, the tapping of her heals far superseded her physical presence, picking up the package, she shut her locker and turned as the redhead entered the room.

Patsy held her breath as she nearly ploughed in to Delia, she hadn’t expected for her to be there. She felt Delia touch her hand, turning it over and pressing a solid object in to it. “Merry Christmas Pats.” Patsy stood there dumbfounded and unable to will her tongue or feet to move. She felt a hand reach up and cup the side of her face, fingers stroking gently before a pair of soft lips on her own, she found herself kissing Delia back. When the brunette pulled back she looked in the Doctor’s eyes and smiled before leaving.

\--

Patsy found her mind wandering during her shift, she couldn’t think straight and paid the ultimate price when a woman's foot slipped during labour and hit her face side on. The lady’s husband profusely apologised and Patsy managed to laugh it off, stating it might knock some sense into her. Once the baby was safely delivered (albeit with the use of forceps) and the new parents were happy cooing over their new daughter, Patsy picked up her cigarettes and snuck out for a sneaky one.

It was fucking freezing outside, the air hitting her like icy claws. Patsy had risked going for a cigarette in the courtyard, the area was often more quiet than the front of the hospital and it meant Patsy could have a few moments alone with her thoughts. Sitting down on the bench she lit the white stick and drew on it hard before looking down at the package sat on her lap. Gingerly she turned over the tag and read the note from Delia. She smiled, thumbing the edge of the tag, trying not to smudge the ink before pulling it off and putting it in the pocket of her trousers. Opening the package she found it to be a book, turning it over she saw the title and the author and began to cry softly.

\--

It had been one late Wednesday afternoon when they were both off, Patsy had asked the brunette if she would like to come over for some stress relief. After a good roll around in the kitchen, living room, stairs and bedroom Delia found herself satisfied but hungry. 

Patsy rolled over, her naked form in all its glory in the late afternoon sun. “I suppose I could make you dinner. “

“Tea.” Delia corrected. 

“Okay, a pot of tea.”

“No, tea, dinner.”

“You make absolutely no sense. Would you like dinner or tea?”

“Tea. I spotted some steak earlier in the fridge, looks a rather nice ribeye.”

“So you do want dinner?”

Delia’s face broke. “I’m just fucking with you. In Wales we have breakfast, dinner and tea, the English don’t seem to get it, especially you toffs.”

“That’s because tea is accompanied with scones.” Patsy’s RP accent certainly emphasized on the scones.

Delia rolled herself out of bed, having no shame in standing naked in front of Patsy. “What else is on offer?” Patsy cocked an eyebrow. “No, I don’t mean that, I think six go rounds and four orgasms is quite enough. Besides, I want to have a look in your library.” Delia slipped on one of Patsy’s pajama tops, due to their six inch height difference, it hung mid thigh.

Patsy had been in the kitchen for half an hour, she was going to have the steak with Trixie but she had phoned to advise she was going out with Christopher and wouldn’t be back until the following day. She had made a brandy peppercorn sauce, rosti potatoes and green veg to accompany the steak, she just had to find Delia to see how she wished to have her steak cooked. Heading back up the two flights up stairs she found Delia exactly where she left her, Patsy leant on the door and smiled. “Are you enjoying yourself?” She watched as Delia’s eyes dashed across the page before looking up. 

“Your collection is rather impressive.” Delia uncurled her legs and stood up, placing the book on the side. “I haven’t read poetry in some time, Wilfred Owen.” She stroked the cover.

“I always found him rather depressing.”

“It’s beautiful.” Delia stroked the cover. “I do have one complaint.”

“Go on.”  
“You must have every Roald Dahl book going but I cannot see George’s Marvellous Medicine. My Tad used to read it to me.”

“Tad?”

“Welsh for Dad. It was my favourite book, I used to make him read it to me all the time. Once we would finish it I would ask him to go round again.”

“I never realised I didn’t have it.”

“Double negative.” Delia smiled. “We’ll have to see if we can get you a copy.”

“Are you coming downstairs to eat or would you prefer to hide in here all night?”

“I’ll come down, besides, I can’t miss an opportunity to watch you bending over braless.”

“I only came up to ask you how you wanted your steak, you’ve corrected my grammar and now sexually harassed me.”

“Medium please, after all you should know that anything less wouldn’t melt the fat.”

“And now insulted my cookery skills.”

\--

Patsy stroked the cover, her mind drifting back to that afternoon. Nothing special actually happened when she really thought about it, it was a lazy afternoon of sex, good food and wine. They had proceeded to watch television in to the evening, much to Delia’s annoyance, Patsy insisted on watching University Challenge whilst Delia went back upstairs to retrieve the book she had been so engulfed in earlier. The parquet flooring had made Delia’s feet cold and she put them behind Patsy’s warm back making the redhead squeal.  
Patsy’s mind then wandered to her best friend, or more so her relationship with Christopher. They seemed to flit about between the their two houses, sharing dinner, a bed, silly jokes, annoyances, but most of all, enjoyed in being one another’s company. When she compared that with what she had with Delia there was no real difference. As much as she had tried to kid herself it wasn’t, she know deep down there was far more to it. 

Patsy pulled out her phone and scrolled down to the one person she really wanted to talk to.

“Hello?”

“How would you like dinner and a bottle of wine on me?”

\--

Patsy sat at the table, waiting for her guest to arrive, she had already managed one large glass of wine and with little to no food left inside of her she felt her head spin slightly.  
“So sorry I’m late! Bloody children, bloody mother, bloody sister in-law! I need a glass of wine.” Caroline dumped her bag on the floor and slid her jacket off before helping herself to the bottle and pouring a generous measure before topping Patsy’s backup. “I think we’ll need another one of these before our starters are finished.” 

“Here.” Patsy offered the wine list towards Caroline. “Whatever takes your fancy.”

Caroline placed her glasses on before peering over the top of them at Patsy. “You’ve obviously not brought me here for a quick chat.” Her eyes flicked back to the list as she narrowed down her choices. “And clearly it’s going to be a serious one as the price of this wine is ridiculous.”

Patsy smiled at Caroline, they had chatted over the telephone over the past few months and met once for coffee. They hadn’t really had a deep conversation since the night Caroline stopped the redhead going home with Sarah. If Patsy was perfectly honest she just enjoyed Caroline’s company, the women was highly intelligent, witty, dry and exactly the person Patsy needed right now.

“Normally I am the one paying.” Caroline said out loud. “It’s quite nice to be spoilt by someone 15 years my junior.” Patsy rolled her eyes. “Don’t worry, I shan’t expect sex.”

The waiter who stood next to them chose to advert his eyes as Caroline and Patsy smiled at each other. “Are you ready for me to take your order?”

“Well as I shan’t expect any after dinner activities I think I’ll go for the full four courses.”

When they had finished ordering Patsy looked at Caroline. “Why did you have to do that? Poor chap looked like he wanted the ground to swallow him up.” She gave an amused smile.

“Too many years of being a headteacher, I’ve got to get my kicks somewhere. Besides, I used to teach that little shit of a boy 8 or 9 years ago. He didn’t half spread around some things about me. It’s nice to get revenge every now and then.”

Patsy laughed. “What did he say?”

“Oh he used to say all sorts of idiotic things, stick things on my eldest’s back, my particular favourite was ‘my mum drinks from the furry cup.’ ”

The redhead raised her eyebrows as she took a sip of wine. “Furry cup?” She swallowed the wine and stifled a laugh. “Sorry.”

“No, it’s alright, it didn’t bother me then and it doesn’t bother me now.” Caroline looked down at the stem of her wine glass. “Patsy, we didn’t come here to discuss the semantics of my school, you’ve obviously finally decided you’re ready to talk, so tell me what has been going on.”

“Where to start, the arguments, the staring, the upset and the christmas present she gave me.”

“Where would you like to start?”

“Oh I don’t know, let's go with the order you’ve given, the arguments. Care to elaborate?” She speared and olive with the cocktail stick and popped it in her mouth with resounding confidence.

“She cornered me the first time, I agreed to go for a drink with Delia, I had a panic attack before I even got there and went she started probing I just couldn’t cope. I tried telling her but it came out all wrong, I just yelled at her.”

\--

They were both halfway through their last course and the wine was free flowing along with the conversation, Caroline had managed to squeeze the majority of the situation from Patsy (with a little help from the wine.)

“Patsy.” Caroline couldn’t help slip in to headmistress mode, she looked the redhead dead on as she spoke. “What is it you are so afraid of?”

Patsy looked down at her spoon and fork, the sweet dessert suddenly turning sour in her mouth. She swallowed hard, closing her eyes, trying to force down the barrier she had built up for so long. “I can’t...” 

A warm hand covered her own, it wasn’t the person she wanted, but she was met with the same bright blue eyes, kind, understanding eyes that were etched in to her memory. “You can, I spent over 15 years of my life hiding who I really was, I tried to kid myself that I was happy but the reality of it was, I wasn’t. Kate unlocked something in me, I wanted nothing more to be with her, I nearly lost her, I did lose her for a bit.” Caroline took the briefest of pauses to compose herself. “She gave me one last chance and I am so grateful that she did.”

“How?”

“She came back a my mother’s wedding and asked me to dance. I snogged her in front of all the guests.”

Patsy let out a laugh. “I don’t think that would go down too well in the gyne ward. I can tell you the charge nurse would probably kill the pair of us.”

“That’s not your biggest fear. You’ve been out for years, you must have had most of the girls on your course.”

“Thanks.”

“My point is there’s something holding you back, and I am going to ask my original question, what is it you are afraid of?”

\--

Patsy stood outside the restaurant with Caroline, both of them more than slightly drunk due to the three bottles of red wine consumed between the two of them, Patsy had then chose to round off the evening with a whiskey chaser.

“Thank you Caroline.” Patsy reached forward and grasped Caroline’s hand. “You’ve been so good to me the past few months. I don’t know what I would have done without you.” She leant forward and pressed her lips to Caroline’s.

As Patsy pulled away Caroline smiled. “I was joking earlier about having sex.” Patsy let out a laugh. “Do me one favour, don’t call her tonight, wait until tomorrow. Merry Christmas Patsy.” She kissed Patsy on the cheek before stepping in to the waiting taxi.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A step forward and a broken leg back. Patsy's past is to be revealed... Sort of.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well it has been a while.... For that I am sorry. Life has somewhat run away with me of late and I am find little time to write. I hope you enjoy this chapter and I promise to try and not let such a length of time go between the next.  
> Let me know what you think.

The constant flicking between nights and days was killing Delia off. It was Christmas Eve eve and she was due to start the night shift at 6.30pm. Delia had managed to accomplish very little on her few days off, her sleeping pattern was all over the shot and she found herself awake at all times of the night and sleeping at random times in the afternoons. She had dozed off on the sofa, half a lazy eye watching Matilda that morning, it was only the buzz of her phone that stirred her from her slumber. A cast a lazy eye at the screen to check who was ringing her, she had half expected some slightly loopy relative wishing her a Merry Christmas a two days early. The ringtone suddenly had her wide awake and alert, only one person on her phone had that ringtone assigned to them. She stared at the phone as it continued to ring, the whistling rang off. Delia sighed, she had put the ringtone on to piss Patsy off, she hated being called Patience so in jest Delia had changed her ringtone to the Guns n Roses’ version. In hindsight it was rather ironic. Her phone pinged, notifying her of a voicemail. Gingerly, Delia picked up the phone and held it to her ear. 

“Deels, it’s me, Patsy. I don’t know where to start.” A loud sigh was audible on the voicemail and a long pause followed. “I’ve been an utter fool. I want to see you, I know you probably don’t want to see me.” Another loud sigh was heard on the message. “If you can find it in you to see me...” Patsy trailed off, Delia could visualise Patsy’s long fingers raking through her long hair. “I don’t know. Just call me. I miss you.”

Delia sat blankly, unsure of what to make of the message. Her heart was beating a tattoo and she was sure it was going to come flying out of her chest at any minute. Picking up the phone she dialed 121 and heard the familiar waffle of the women on voicemail before pressing 5 to hear the message again. She repeated this several times before taking hold of the olive branch.

"I’ll be at yours in an hour."

Delia had made the conscious decision not to make too much of an effort, it meant Patsy couldn’t wind her arm her little finger but telling her she was pretty or her perfume smelt nice. She had enough experience with Patsy and when she wanted sex, this was also the reason she didn’t make any effort to trim any areas of her body. One look at a hairy leg should do the trick if Patsy even had the notion that anything more was going to happen.

The forty or so minutes that it took Delia to get across London where some of the longest she had ever known. She wasn’t sure what Patsy was going to say or do to her for that matter; in short she was shitting herself. The brunette could feel the hot sweat creeping up the body and neck, mostly presenting itself in rash format. She fanned her neck to try and get rid of it as she approached the wooden door. Delia took in a deep breath before rapping the brass knocker hard, she took a step back from the door unsure what she might be greeted with. She pushed her hands in her coat pockets and tucked her chin in her scarf, the air was freezing and she swore she could smell snow in the air. The locks on the door clicked, Delia could hear a dog barking across the street and turned around to take a look at the gobby rat (the designer choice for rich plums) but unfortunately for her karma caught up with her thoughts and as the door opened she lost her footing and fell. She felt the horror going in slow motion tumbling down the flight of stairs, she knew she was in trouble when she heard a resounding snap of her ankle, the white hot pain shot up her leg immediately, she clutched her ankle, her nursing instinct already telling her she was fucked.

“Deels!“ Patsy had witnessed the entire scene unfold in front of her and ran down the steps to the brunette. “Are you alright?” 

Delia was white and a fine sweat had broken across her brow, her right ankle was now pointing at 2 o’clock instead of 12. “Do I look alright? My fucking ankle is pointing in the wrong directly, I’ve just heard the fucking thing snap so it’s definitely broken and you, a doctor, have asked if I am ok?” She snapped as she clutched her broken leg.

“I’ll call and ambulance.” Patsy fumbled for her phone, desperately trying to get the useless lump to work.

“Do not ring for an ambulance Patience! Wasting precious NHS resources, you should know better! I can get up if you stop twatting around and help me up. There’s an A&E at Charing Cross, it’s not far from here, what a fucking joke! Just what I need.” Delia moaned as she gripped hold of Patsy’s outstretched hands and hauled herself upright, the majority of her body weight now leaning on the redhead.

“Deels, I really think...”

“Just for once Patience do as you are fucking told!” Delia felt Patsy’s arm slide around her back to support the extra weight as she guided Delia towards her car.

“Are you going to be able to get in, there’s not much room and it’s fairly low.”

“Don’t drive like the pompous arsehole like you normally do and I’ll be fine.”

“Are you alright if I get my keys?”

“I’m hardly going to run off am I? Get a move on, my leg is in agony, I think the bloody thing needs to be reset.”

Patsy dashed around the house, grabbing her bag, a pillow and keys before locking the front door. She threw her bag in the back and went back round to help the brunette. After a lot of grappling and swearing on Delia’s behalf, she managed to fold her in to a seating position. Patsy carefully lifted Delia’s ankle and placed it on the pillow. A loud moan came from the brunettes lips. “I’m sorry.”

The drive to the hospital was a relatively short one, Patsy pulled up on the double yellows and was berated by Delia. “Do not park here, you’ll block any ambulances coming in, go and park in the car park, you’ll just have to help me.”

“You are rather bossy.” Patsy leant out the window and took the ticket from the machine.

“That’s rich coming from you.”

“Sorry Deels, there’s a speed bump.” The jolt hit Delia who moaned again. “I did tell you. In hindsight I should have brought the Range.”

Delia turned to look at Patsy. “I’m sorry, the Range? And where do you keep that? In the country estate?”

“If you are not careful I am going to speed up for the next bump.”

“Sorry.”

Patsy pulled up into a parking space and went round to help Delia. Hobbling across to the hospital, Delia made it to reception, her face devoid of all colour and dripping in sweat.

Patsy leant Delia on the wall next to reception. “Deels? Delia, look at me.” Delia swallowed hard, Patsy grabbed the women walking past. “Nurse, have you a bowl, she’s going to be sick.” Patsy knew that the bowl wasn't going to make it in time and handed Delia her bag. She pulled back the dark brown locks that had worked their way free. “It’s alright.” The nurse reappeared holding the bowl. “A bit late, but I’ll take this one too.” She held her handbag up and grimaced at its state. “You okay there for two seconds Deels?” She received a nod in response.

“How can I help you?”

“My, er, my, friend. She’s broken her ankle.”

“Name?”

“Delia Busby.”

“Date of birth?”

“January 30th 1992.”

“Take a seat, the nurse will call you.”

“Please, her ankle isn’t straight, it needs looking at as soon as possible.”

“She will be prioritised, please take a seat.”

Patsy rolled her eyes. “Come on Deels, now I know why people complain about pen pushers in the NHS.”

They took a seat in the waiting area. Delia propped herself up against the glass, enjoying the feeling of the cool glass and her hot skin. “Sorry about your handbag Pats.”

“It’s okey.”

“I’ll replace it for you.”

“That’s not necessary.”

“Please let me.”

“We’ll talk about it later.”

“Pats, we are sat here waiting to have my foot looked at, might as well have a look for a new bag. Might take my mind off how painful my foot is.”

“It was an old Mulberry. Don’t worry about it.” Patsy gave Delia’s hand a squeeze, it did not help, the last remaining colour drained out of Delia’s face.

“Oh God Pats, I am so sorry.”

“It’s alright Deels, it doesn’t matter, I was more concerned about you throwing up all over the floor and you. Besides, I’m not the one sat here with a broken foot. What a way to spend a day off.”

“By all means leave.”

“I didn’t mean it like that.”

“I know, I’m sorry.” Delia reached out and wrapped her hand around the lower half of the redhead’s arm. “I’m just hurting.”

“I know you are.” Patsy turned her attentions to the television screen above them, it was muted and the subtitles were at least 5 seconds below the actual programme. “How long do you reckon we’ll have to wait?”

Delia let out a laugh. “You really don’t live up to your name do you?”

“What do you mean?”

“We’ve been sat here for all of 1 minute and you are complaining.”

“I’m not complaining, I’m just posing a question.” Patsy pouted, her eyes travelling back to the screen.

“So, are we gonna continue skirt around the actual conversation that we need to have or talk about this mind numbing shit further?”

“You used to be far more charming.”

“The latter I see.” Delia looked at Patsy who had shifted in her seat. “Go home Pats, I can’t do this charade with you.”

“Please don’t.” Patsy whispered.

“Start talking.”

Patsy took in a sharp intake of breath before deciding where to start. “Some of this is going to be heavily edited otherwise it will sound like an Emmerdale omnibus.”

“We may be a while.” Delia gestured at the various people surrounding her.

“Please.”

“Alright. The reason I rang you earlier was, well,” Patsy raised her eyebrows, wishing the could have a cigarette right now, before chuckling. “Well, I got a bloody good dressing down.”

“Phyllis?”

“No, Caroline.”

“Who’s Caroline?”

“She’s somebody I knew when I went off the rails the first time round.” Delia looked incredulous but did her best to hide it from Patsy. “Christ I wish I had a cigarette.”

“I wouldn’t be sat here if you did.”

“I know you hate me smoking. Nervous habit picked up in boarding school. Never broke it.” Patsy flicked her eyebrows up. “I was bullied, badly. I was cornered by these group of girls nearly everyday, they made my life a misery. Smoking was a good way to escape them, I used to sneak on to the roof, I could usually find a hour of solidarity in my day by going up there. Whenever I felt scared I used to sneak off. The nuns never cottoned on.”

“Nuns?”

“Mmm, Catholic.” Patsy held her hand as if she was smoking, Delia could see her thumb and third finger rubbing together. “One of the girls I shared a room with found my diary, I was struggling with being gay and she told someone. You know what it’s like, it just spiralled. Every girl thought I wanted to see her naked, touch her, I never ever showered with any of them, the rumor mill started and there was no stopping it.” Delia reached out and grasped Patsy’s hand. “I asked my Father if I could be transferred to another school but he wouldn’t hear of it. He told me it was the best school in the country and I was to finish my education.”

“Your Father, where was he?”

“As soon as he got better he left and went back to Hong Kong. He’s been there ever since.”

“Better?”

“Yes, he was ill for such a long time. Please don’t ask me about that here.” Patsy shut her eyes at the memory.

“I won’t.”

“Thank you. I met Trixie at boarding school, I know she told you that. She’s such a shit when she’s drunk.” The redhead turned to look at Delia with a smile. “She can’t keep her mouth shut when she’s sober let alone when she’s got half a bottle of something down her neck. Between you and me I worry about her, I hardly ever see her without a drink in her hand after work.”

“By all accounts you haven’t exactly been sober.”

“Have you had people spying on me?.”

“Like you say, the rumor mill churns. Besides, there have been some days were you need only walk past me and I can smell last night’s whiskey on you. Never falter on your drink do you?”

“Another trait of boarding school, I blame Trixie, well, her grandparents to say the least.”

Delia frowned. “I don’t follow.”

“Trixie came to the school to do her A levels, she’d won a full scholarship, she’s exceptionally bright, I don’t know why she didn’t become a doctor, she had the brains. I wasn’t the most pleasant to her for the first half of the term, I expect you know that too, but she was so persistent, she broke through in the end. The bitch found my smoking place and accompanied it with a bottle of whisky.” She grinned at Delia to take the sting out of her words. “We would spend most weekends enjoying the silence on the roof, we would smoke and drink until we either passed out or somebody would start calling for us. Some of my favourite memories were up there, she made school just that little bit more bearable.”

“Pats?” Patsy looked up at Delia. “Can I ask a question?” She nodded. “When you yelled at me during one of our arguments you said you didn’t even go home for holidays.”

“No,” She sighed. “Trixie’s grandparents offered but I always declined, the last thing I want was to watch everybody being happy families while I sat on the outside looking in on them. They always gave me a present, it would be something daft like socks and a thick jumper, when I reached my final year they accompanied it with a whisky. I should say now that Trixie lived with her grandparents, her life isn’t a rosey as she makes out. They were the ones who paid for everything. Her family is a mess as well but that's a story for another day.”

“Delia Busby!” A nurse called out and looked around for the individual who responded to that name. 

“Give us a hand up.” Delia went to stand and the nurse saw her and walked over.

“I think it’s best if you sit back down. Let me grab you a wheelchair, that foot looks like it hurts a bit.”

“Just a bit.” Delia grimaced at Patsy slowly lowered the brunette back down, a few expletives slipped from Delia as he foot was knocked in the process. The nurse appeared round the corner and helped Delia shuffle across to it. 

“I’ll wait here.” Patsy sat back in the chair. “Just call me if you want me.”

“I am going to take you straight to a bed, you’re gonna need something more for the pain than just paracetamol.” 

“Come on Pats. You’ll get bored in 2 minutes here on your own.”

“Is that ok?” Patsy looked at the nurse. 

“Sure.”

Delia stifled a laugh. “Are you actually obeying a nurse’s orders?”

“Fuck off Busby.” Patsy’s voice was lowered and she subtly offered Delia a hand gesture.

Delia rolled her eyes as they entered triage. “Number 16, here we are. Let’s get you up on that bed.” The nurse went to help Delia but struggle to supported her full weight. “Would you mind?” She looked over at Patsy who picked up Delia’s other arm and hauled her on to the bed. 

“Helps to be nearly six foot.” She smiled kindly.

“Right Miss Busby.”

“Delia, please.”

“We just need to confirm a few details.”

Patsy’s mind began to wander as the nurse went through the monotonous questions that every nurse of doctor ever asked a patient. She cocked her head, the nurse looked familiar, she was around the same age as her, her hair colour was dyed, the eyebrows giving the game away. She couldn’t place her finger on the matter and her thoughts were cut short as Delia interrupted.

“What do you mean you are cutting my shoe off?”

“Well I am afraid that given the state of your foot, I am not happy to pull the shoe off.”

“You’ve already cut my jeans but the boots are a no go, do you have any idea how much these cost?” 

“I can’t risk causing any more damage.”

“Pats, grab my foot and pull.”

“No way, you need to listen to the nurse.”

“Patience Mount, if you do not pull my boot off I’ll...”

“Do what? Chase after me, hit me? Hardly likely is it?” Patsy scoffed. “Just let the nurse cut your bloody boot off. I’ll buy you another pair.”

“I don’t want another pair, I like these!”

“I swear to God. And you say I’m stubborn. Tell you what, you’ve already been sick in my handbag, and I now have to have a trip to Mulberry to replace it, I’ll buy you so shoes at the same time.”

“You are not buying me a outlandish pair of boots, they are a month’s rent.”

“Get a grip Delia. Nurse, cut the boots off, we’ll argue about it later.”

Delia sat like a scolded child as the nurse made the final cut. “Shit.” Her face went pale once more. 

“Are you going to be sick again?”

Delia shook her head. “Here.” The nurse turned a dial on the wall and handed Delia the tube. “Now, this is gas and air...”

“I’m familiar with it. I’m a midwife, I spend half my life telling women to breath.” She bit down on the tube and inhaled hard as the boot was pulled off. “Christ that hurts.”

“Alright, worst bit over.”

“Delia, did you not shave your legs?”


End file.
